I am very well connected you know. I have lots of dear friends
in Nigeria, the sons of royal families, bank managers and
highly respected civil servants. They are very generous people
and send me emails all the time offering to send me large
sums of money.
I also get lots of emails telling me that bigger is better
and perhaps I need some sort of medication.
But is bigger really better?
Anyone who has tried to crack a walnut when all they had available
was a sledge hammer knows that it is not easy, there is a
tendency to pulverise the contents.
In the same way if someone puts a huge great water pump on
your roof powerful enough to empty the bilges of the Queen
Mary in order to push a bit of water to your shower there
is a likelihood of removing your skin to say nothing of the
risk of drowning. There are other disadvantages. The deep
rumble of the pump can be heard 3 miles away, not conducive
to a spot of yoga, and the electrical bills become excessive
to say the least.
What is not quite so obvious is that, from a technical point
of view, a large pump to do a small job has a particular problem
– it pumps too much water. It is rather like getting
a gorilla to ice a cake, one small squeeze and there is icing
all over the cake, the table and the floor.
When you turn on a tap the pump starts but, if the pump is
too big, the water can’t get out of the shower head
fast enough, the pressure builds up and the pump stops. A
split second later the tap has caught up so the pump starts
again. And so on ad nauseum. The water coming out of your
shower “pulses”. You know what I mean, one minute
the water is bouncing off the far wall of your bathroom and
the next it is dribbling on the floor.
So this huge great pump is starting and stopping constantly
putting an enormous strain on the pump, the pipes and the
roof. Pumps like this have a way of getting totally fed up,
breaking their anchor bolts and going for a walk and a half
ton pump walking off your roof is no joke.
But no one would install such a ridiculously large pump would
they?
Well you would think not but the other day I saw such a pump.
In fact two pumps.
Why? Who knows.
Perhaps if you are a contractor and you can persuade your
client they need a pumping system costing Rp 70 million why
sell them one for only Rp 5 million? But then an expatriate
designed this system. Perhaps he didn’t understand what
he was doing and thought he would overengineer “just
to make sure”, perhaps he was an enthusiast on pumping
systems and got a bit carried away or perhaps he had just
received one too many of those emails, his manhood was challenged
so he just had to prove that bigger really is better.
Are you looking for a bilge pump for an ocean liner? Perhaps
a battleship? I know a nice lady who can help you out.
The same lady has an electrical system in each of her four
houses suitable for controlling Blackpool Illuminations. Once
again gross over specification. (You haven’t heard of
the Famous Blackpool illuminations? Don’t worry you
haven’t missed much but did you know that while Bali
has a million visitors a year Blackpool gets 6 million?).
The lesson in all this (apart from Bali badly needing kiss
me quick hats and some rather puerile lighting) is that if
you are having a house built or having equipment installed
make sure the specification suits the job in hand. If in doubt
look at the price and if it looks on the high side get it
checked out.
In my recent article about air conditioners I omitted to include
an important point regarding size. While many people get along
with air conditioners that are too small for the room there
are some people that believe bigger must be better. Be careful,
it is not a good thing to install an air conditioner that
is too large. If you do, like the waterpump, the air conditioner
will keep switching on and off and drive you nuts.
In fact in many cases it may be that using several small units
is more advantageous than a single large unit. Let me give
you an example. If you go to the Arena Sports Bar in Sanur
you will notice that the rooms are cooled by as many as 12
large domestic air conditioners rather than a single “industrial”
unit. Domestic units take advantage of the benefits of mass
production and are low cost compared to large industrial units.
Such a system has great flexibility and should one unit break
down the whole system is not put out of action and it is not
a serious problem. In addition further down the track you
don’t have to replace the whole system at once so upgrading
can be done progressively.
If you talk to a salesman trying to make a big sale he may
not agree. “Industrially cooled air is far superior
to that cheap domestically cooled stuff”.
Years ago I was designing a computer system for managing supplies
in a major hospital in Australia. At the time I surprised
people by specifying networked desktop PCs. At the same time
a neighbouring hospital decided to go for a small mainframe
computer which of course cost many times more both in hardware
and the special “one off” programs it required.
The PCs and their software provided a far cheaper, more flexible
and easily upgradable system which eventually was installed
in hospitals throughout the state. The mainframe was a disaster.
As expected within only a few years desktops had developed
to the extent that they had more power than the original mainframe
anyway. More to the point you can’t play solitaire or
dungeons and dragons on a mainframe.
So what is the relevance of all this? Well if you are installing
systems you might consider using small multiple systems rather
large individual ones. If you have ten villas with twenty
bathrooms it may be advantageous to have individual water
heaters for each bathroom, separate pumps for each villa,
multiple air conditioners for large spaces. You can always
add extra units later to increase capacity and maintenance
costs tend to be staggered while a single repair to a large
central unit may make you stagger.
Good news! I have just had a call from the Pentagon, they’re
looking for a pump for an aircraft carrier in the Persian
Gulf.
Phil Wilson
Phil Wilson a project director for Focus Indonesia and a partner
of MrFixit property maintenance services. Opinions expressed
are those of Phil Wilson. If you have any questions or comments
he can be contacted at the office on 0361 288 789 or through
the website at www.mrfixitbali.com
