This is indeed a tricky one for new players, and even sometimes
for foreigners who have lived in Bali for quite some time.
In the short space I have, I’ll tell you a bit about
anger and sadness in a Balinese context.
For the most part, Balinese keep their emotions in. So, you
really have to be a bit of a detective to find out how they
are feeling. Sometimes you can read their feelings by their
body language. For example, if someone is angry with you they
may not look at you or even ignore you completely. Their eyes
may become dark and watery and many people also shake or ‘jigger’
one of their legs up and down in an agitated fashion. If you
are speaking to them in Indonesian, or particularly in Balinese,
they may change their language to a lower level, using ‘kamu’
instead of Ibu/Bapak/anda or using more words in low Balinese
than a more polite form (too detailed to get into here). People
will often continue smiling, but the smile will seem slightly
‘put on’, and not bright and cheery like the typical
Balinese smile. An angry or offended friend may not visit
for quite some time, or promise to come round but never show
up – but this very much depends on the person.
Feelings of sadness or depression are really hard to read,
because people here are really good at putting on a brave
face. There are some tell-tale signs, though. If someone is
really sad, they will go quiet and not joke as much as they
normally do. A depressed person may spend less time with the
family and more time in their room. Often people don’t
realise that another person is down until it manifests itself
in suicide – a relatively common occurrence in Bali,
especially since the downturn in the economy.
More about other emotions such as jealousy, envy, disappointment,
love and sexual attraction in the next issue of KK.
