Status is still an important factor even in post-feudal
Balinese society. People measure themselves by caste but also
– and perhaps more relevant these days – by how
much money they have.
Balinese society is still very much village-based and everybody
knows and wants to know about everyone else, particular family
members and neighbours. If an individual or a family starts
to elevate themselves economically, it will show: new, expensive
car, renovations to the house, big ceremonies, new clothes
etc. People notice and talk about these things quickly, particularly
if the wealth is due to a relationship with a foreigner. This
is where feelings of envy and resentment are easily aroused.
Depending on the person, envy may result in malicious gossip,
material competition or black magic that may result in sickness
or even death. The irony of the situation is that if a family
is already rich and the wealth is inherited, they are respected
by society. You can read envy in a person if they start to
give you the ‘silent treatment’, are genuinely
unfriendly or pretend you don’t exist.
Balinese very rarely express disappointment. If something
goes wrong in life, Balinese are generally very accepting
and look for a religious, philosophical or superstitious cause
to the problem. I’ve seen village performances go terribly,
even after months of excellent practice; yet no one expressed
any feelings of disappointment or regret over the outcome
– what happened, happened.
When in love, especially as a secret admirer, the Balinese
show this through outbursts of jealousy. A person may be unreasonable
or irrational about something, or very untrusting of you if
you keep the company of someone who they see as a threat to
their relationship. A guy who likes a particular girl will
make a real effort to meet or visit her a lot.
Sexual attraction is fairly easy to pick in a woman. She will
punch or pinch the arm of the person she likes and stare at
them a lot. Balinese guys are pretty overt about sexual attraction,
with wolf-whistles and cat-calls being the norm – so
far in Indonesia, laws on verbal sexual harassment are alien,
Western concepts!
