Being brave enough to show others who you really are
I really admire Elton John. He is so ebullient, so ‘out there’ in expressing who he is! I love all the exotic clothes, feathers, crazy glasses, wings, even the dreaded duck costume, and also enjoy how he has expressed his feelings and thoughts through his music. When we look at icons, such as Elton, or Madonna, Marilyn Monroe, what is it that makes them so attractive and special? Why do we want to ‘be like them’? I believe it is because they are fully expressing who they are, and we’d like to be able to do that for ourselves!
Self-Discovery Exercise
Choose one or two of your favourite stars. Then write down what you like about them. For example: John Lennon: creative, funny, zany, altruistic, daring, courageous. Now reflect on how you embody those characteristics now, and consider how you might express them in a larger more fun expansive way. This can be fun to do with a supportive friend who can give you feedback and encouragement.
We are each completely unique and our journey in living is to discover who we are and share it with others. In the process we need to overcome fears of possible ridicule or ‘not belonging’ and get out there and dare to shine! People like Elton are wonderful models for this.
Everything we do is an expression of who we are – the clothes we choose, the car we drive, the possessions we choose. Do yours fully express who you are? What qualities does, say, your wallet embody? What qualities would you like it to express? If you own things that really don’t excite you and make you feel good then... let them go! Allow the illogical, whimsical, fun-loving, or if you prefer, the very staid and normal side of yourself to be expressed through everything you choose. The important thing, is to choose it, rather than just have it just happen to you!
Other ways of expressing ourselves are in our relationships to others. How do you like to relate? Are you honest about your needs and wants? Are you able to say no when you want to? And YES!! when you want to, even if you feel scared? Are you presenting the real you to the world, or is it more a façade? The more honest and real we can be about who we are, the more vulnerable we make ourselves, strangely, the more powerful and attractive we become, because there is no resistance. If we stop resisting who we are, there is nothing for anyone else to argue against! We become more like an elemental child.
Other forms of expression include creativity. How do you celebrate your self, and your feelings? Do you dance them, paint them, make music, sing, do sport, go fishing, cook? What forms of expression have you ‘always wanted to try but haven’t got round to’? What’s stopping you? Often it’s the fear of looking foolish or not being good enough. In order to express ourselves in a new way, we need to find the courage to be not very good at it in the beginning, until we have time to master it. It’s fine to create a rubbishy painting, a badly constructed song, or a dance that is less than graceful. As long as it expresses you in the moment. What could be more beautiful? How could it ever be wrong? I went to Woodford music festival recently in Australia and was struck by the range of different performers – some were polished, original, with wonderful vocal capabilities and highly professional delivery. Others were simply ‘a bloke with a guitar’ - just a man simply singing his own song. I noticed how I enjoyed all of the performances and how the ‘bloke with a song’ was just as valid and interesting as the ‘polished performer’. We all want to hear what you have to say! In your own way!
Meditation – Film Star Self
Relax, breathe deeply, and imagine yourself sitting in a darkened mini cinema just for you. You are waiting for the show, it’s going to be a spiffed up, brighter, film star expression of – YOU! The curtains open and the film begins. The filmstar enters, and you see yourself in a much larger brighter more powerful expression of who you are. Relax and enjoy the show. When it’s complete gently come back to your body. Breathe.
Exercise – Film Star Self
Now answer these questions on behalf of your ‘film star self’. If you were a ‘film star’ version of yourself –
What car would you drive? What pet would you have? What would your favourite food be? Favourite drink? Favourite activity? Greatest triumph? Ideal partner? Greatest regret? Motto in life? Greatest hope?
Now consider ways of bringing these larger expressions of yourself to life. Just choose one and go and try it! Lychee martini, anybody?
(Exercise inspired by Julia Cameron’s creative self-expression books ‘The Vein of Gold’ and ‘The Artists Way’.)
NEXT ISSUE: Soulmates
Jelila is a gifted natural intuitive presently in Byron Bay, Australia on 0410 395 139. She sings you back to health and harmony using her heavenly voice and the natural vibration of crystals.
Jelila welcomes comments and may be contacted on:
Email: jelila@jelila.com
Website: www.jelila.com or www.imagine-retreats.com
