Category: Fixed Abode

I have come across many sad cases over the years of honest people who are building their dream home only to find that the builder has scarpered, the money has run out and there is a distinct dearth of windows and doors, electrical wiring is nowhere to be seen and there is some really effective […]

“I say, are you a scruncher of a folder?” “I beg your pardon?” “You know, a scruncher or a folder?” “Sorry I don’t know what you’re talking about.” “A scruncher or a folder, It’s the question of the moment.” “Whose moment?” “Well I don’t know, everyone’s moment. It’s the question everyone’s asking.” “Asking what?” “The […]

Have you noticed? The Balinese don’t like rain, they don’t drink rainwater and they certainly don’t like it on their heads. It is something to do with picking up evil spirits on it’s way from the sky. Which reminds me, I picked up an evil spirit the other day, it was supposed to be gin […]

Mrs Razzo had a problem. Her husband Tossa never stopped talking. He drove her totally bananas. “It must be a defective gene” she often said. Then one day she realised the only time he ever shut up was when he was knitting. It was as though if his hands were kept busy he didn’t talk […]

I once knew a bloke who to everyone’s surprise joined the army. He said he wanted to learn a trade. “And did you?” we asked. “Yes” he said. “Well what is it?” we enquired. “I’m a machine gunner.” he said proudly. A while later he was pleased to tell us he was learning a new […]

In these challenging times, certainty and security go out of the window. We cannot predict what will happen; however, the worst-case scenario might lead to a breakdown of services and possibly a breakdown of law and order. It is a good idea to consider the services we rely on: electricity, water, gas, internet connection and […]

The earth is big, really really big, it is humungously big, in fact it is the biggest thing we can actually touch. While we may be rather ambivalent towards planet earth, for electrons it is home. As we already know the electron was named after the Greek electron which, of course, means amber. Amber? Yes, […]

It has been very hot recently, far hotter than most of we long term Bali residents can remember. Air conditioners are working harder than ever. Many of us are finding our air conditioners are breaking down more than they used to, why is this?   As far as we can tell there are two reasons. […]

Here is a wonderful titbit of information that will make you the hit at the annual dinner of the Denpasar Toastmakers Club. Did you know there is no such thing as “cold.” Cold is in fact a worldwide con created by exuberant salesmen who want to sell fridges to Eskimos. You see “cold” doesn’t exist, […]

I recently met a couple visiting Bali. The man was not happy, “I’ve got Bali belly” he said. “It was that warung we went to last night”. “It’s usually the water that gets you” I replied. Years ago, I had learned the hard way. When I first came to Indonesia in the 70’s I was […]