“Drips Anonymous”

Water is sneaky stuff. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against water, in fact I quite like it. But it is sneaky. We would be a bit stuffed without water wouldn’t we? For I start we would all be a bit smaller, about 90% smaller in fact. We’d be a bit dirty as well […]

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Tossa Enrico Razzo and His Famous Custard Marble

Mrs. Razzo had a problem. Her husband Tossa never stopped talking. He drove her totally bananas. “It must be a defective gene” she often said. Then one day she realised the only time he ever shut up was when he was knitting. It was as though if his hands were kept busy he didn’t talk […]

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“I’m fixing a hole where the rain gets in”

George Bernard Shaw said “there´s only a few things wrong with England: the people, the place and the weather”. He was English, I´m English and I couldn´t agree more. It was so drizzly and damp you could take the goldfish for a walk. But rain in England was nothing compared with tropical rain. Here in […]

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Ze leettle veel, it eez turning veery fast

My phone rang. A woman with a heavy European accent spoke. “ I vant a man” she said. “A man?” I said. ”An electrician! Do you haf von, can e come now?” “Yes madam, what is your problem?” “My eelectricity bill, it eez veery large.” “How large?” “Well usually it eez fife undred zousand Rupiah […]

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Furry Water

Cedric rang. “I’ve got fur in my kettle” he said. “Does your tea tickle your palette?” I politely enquired. “No, why do you ask?” he said. “Forget it.” I said. “Rats a problem? Do you need pest control or is that huge hairy hound of yours drinking out of it?” (He does have rather a […]

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The Biggest Feet In Town

We English people have a wonky gene you know. It has been officially named Genus Grumblinus but I call mine Fred. Scots, Irish and even Welsh people don’t have it but I am not sure about the Aussies, they certainly are very quick to recognise a winger and as they say “it takes one to […]

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Earthing Delights

Are you feeling grounded? It is an important question. Being grounded keeps the bad feelings away, you know those warm fuzzy feelings you get from an overdose of electrons that are all excited and nowhere to go. Electrons like to go home to their mother, mother earth that is, and in their enthusiasm can be […]

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