“Never Mind The Quality Feel The Width”

I am very well connected you know. I have lots of dear friends in Nigeria, the sons of royal families, bank managers and highly respected civil servants. They are very generous people and send me emails all the time offering to send me large sums of money. I also get lots of emails telling me […]

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Electrocutus Interruptus

You remember that movie Young Einstein? He plays his electric guitar, gets an electric shock and his hair turns frizzy. It isn’t true you know. If you get an electric shock your hair doesn’t go frizzy. I have an electrician who doesn’t have frizzy hair and you can’t tell me he has never had an […]

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“Drips Anonymous”

Water is sneaky stuff. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against water, in fact I quite like it. But it is sneaky. We would be a bit stuffed without water wouldn’t we? For I start we would all be a bit smaller, about 90% smaller in fact. We’d be a bit dirty as well […]

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Tossa Enrico Razzo and His Famous Custard Marble

Mrs. Razzo had a problem. Her husband Tossa never stopped talking. He drove her totally bananas. “It must be a defective gene” she often said. Then one day she realised the only time he ever shut up was when he was knitting. It was as though if his hands were kept busy he didn’t talk […]

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“I’m fixing a hole where the rain gets in”

George Bernard Shaw said “there´s only a few things wrong with England: the people, the place and the weather”. He was English, I´m English and I couldn´t agree more. It was so drizzly and damp you could take the goldfish for a walk. But rain in England was nothing compared with tropical rain. Here in […]

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