“I’m fixing a hole where the rain gets in”

George Bernard Shaw said “there´s only a few things wrong with England: the people, the place and the weather”. He was English, I´m English and I couldn´t agree more. It was so drizzly and damp you could take the goldfish for a walk. But rain in England was nothing compared with tropical rain. Here in […]

Read more

Ze leettle veel, it eez turning veery fast

My phone rang. A woman with a heavy European accent spoke. “ I vant a man” she said. “A man?” I said. ”An electrician! Do you haf von, can e come now?” “Yes madam, what is your problem?” “My eelectricity bill, it eez veery large.” “How large?” “Well usually it eez fife undred zousand Rupiah […]

Read more

Furry Water

Cedric rang. “I’ve got fur in my kettle” he said. “Does your tea tickle your palette?” I politely enquired. “No, why do you ask?” he said. “Forget it.” I said. “Rats a problem? Do you need pest control or is that huge hairy hound of yours drinking out of it?” (He does have rather a […]

Read more

The Biggest Feet In Town

We English people have a wonky gene you know. It has been officially named Genus Grumblinus but I call mine Fred. Scots, Irish and even Welsh people don’t have it but I am not sure about the Aussies, they certainly are very quick to recognise a winger and as they say “it takes one to […]

Read more

Earthing Delights

Are you feeling grounded? It is an important question. Being grounded keeps the bad feelings away, you know those warm fuzzy feelings you get from an overdose of electrons that are all excited and nowhere to go. Electrons like to go home to their mother, mother earth that is, and in their enthusiasm can be […]

Read more

“I’m only here for the Crack”

I recently got a call from a man with cracks in his house. He sits in his living room with a pleasant breeze and a nice view across the countryside but he has to admit he is a bit worried. You see there isn’t a window on that side of his house. He has built […]

Read more

“It’s the water that gets you”

I recently met a couple visiting Bali. The man was not happy, “I’ve got Bali belly” he said. “It must have been that warung we went to last night”. “It’s usually the water that gets you” I replied. Years ago I had learned the hard way. When I first came to Indonesia in the 70’s […]

Read more